Dear Dr. Milrod:

I’ve now been with a couple of women who have selected to use female condoms instead of a regular male condom. It can take a while to insert properly but I’ve also found that it can be difficult to switch sexual positions if this entails withdrawing. Sometimes it seems that the female condom begins to dislodge, for example in moving from the woman on top to the man on top. Having to stop to make sure it’s still properly secured creates a loss of momentum and makes the sex seem almost mechanical. Additionally, assuming that the female condom has been dislodged or removed – is it possible to ejaculate into this condom more than once? I personally like the feel much better than a male condom, but I am bothered by the lack of flexibility. Do you have any tips on how make for a better overall sexual experience when using a female condom?

Wyldman

Dear Wyldman:

Those female condoms can be like diaphragms or cervical caps – it takes some skill to fit it properly, even though the vagina can accommodate all sorts of objects going in and out. As for positions and spontaneity, these are the limitations of this condom, for some couples. Once it feels like it’s coming out, then yes, you have to stop and make sure it’s still in there. So the best advice I can offer is to concentrate on making foreplay as creative as possible and then go for the full enchilada at the very end. It is also possible to change positions without taking out the penis. You’ll need to be a little flexible and actually use your upper body to lift your partner, but if she hangs on to you with her legs, it can be done. If you’re in missionary, you can stick together and roll over. Of course, if it’s doggy we’re talking about, then yes, there might be some difficulty in switching.

Do NOT ejaculate more than once in the female condom. Like male condoms, they are not to be reused, even though the World Health Organization did some research on reuse in developing countries where price and supply were issues. Finally, the FDA has stated that for best protection against pregnancy, the male condom is superior in its protective application.

Christine Milrod, Ph.D.